I am Isy Pérez. I am a fifth quarter law student. I am someone who enjoys saying “I am.” I graduated from a small Jesuit university in Kansas City, MO by the name of Rockhurst University.
I came closer to my faith for all the wrong reasons. Rather, it was one reason, a girl. I’d gone to daily communion service in high school, sure, but that was just something I did because it was my chance to be alone at 6:30 in the morning.
At Rockhurst I began attending daily mass for a girl. I joined a CLC (Christian Life Community) to impress a girl. I even attended a few pro-life meetings so I could hang out with this girl. I despise protests and protesting yet I did it in the cold without putting my hands in my pockets for a girl. Funny thing is, I thought that not putting my cold hands in the warmth of my pockets would make me seem tough and impress her. Sound lawyer-ly logic.
Heck, I started going to St. Peter’s because of this girl. I went on Awakening because I’d helped her staff an Awakening at Truman State University. My entire faith life was built on the premise of impressing this girl, on trying to win her over.
I don’t have to tell you that’s a bad premise and that it’s a very disingenuous way of approaching God and faith because you probably have more sense than me. Naturally, it was only a matter of time until that foundation was removed and the structure crumbled on its utilitarian self.
When the pursuit of that girl finally ended, when that chapter of my life finally closed, I felt like the joggers who ran with Forrest Gump. After Forrest stopped running in the middle of the desert and went home one of the joggers yelled out, “No what do we do?” I couldn’t sympathize anymore. The whole reason I went to daily mass and prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet, really the whole reason I changed an entire part of my life to revolve around the Church wasn’t to get closer to God. It was to get closer to this girl. This objective that was now off the table. Now what?
They say shoot for the moon because even if you miss you’ll land amongst the stars. I’m sure Jim Lovell of Apollo 13 would disagree, but in a sense I shot for this girl by filling my life with holy things. When the dust of the romance settled, I might have had initial questions as to why I kept on with my faith, but I couldn’t help but notice that I had a really good infrastructure for building a real faith life. Not a faith life built to impress anyone, but a faith life to get closer to God for the sake of getting closer to God.
When the dust settled, that’s what remained. By the way it’s kind of cool that God can forgive me for pretty much using him for a good four or so years.
I’m not sure what else I can say so, in the traditional Forrest Gump fashion, that’s all I have to say about that.